Thursday 25 July 2024

That final goodbye




 Keith is no longer suffering.  He passed away peacefully yesterday after being put on end of life care on Tuesday.  We tried to make his final days full of all the things he loved, and although the morphine made him very drowsy, talked about our happy family memories, and included him in the conversation.  There was laughter and tears, and his favourite films and music. Thank God he is free of the constrictions of a body which prevented him from doing all he loved.  The children were here with me and have been an absolute pillar of strength.

We will take his ashes to Scarborough, scene of many happy holidays for him as a child, and later with his own family.  It seems the perfect place.  We will have a Fish and Chip supper there, in his memory - that was truly his favourite meal - and celebrate his life, but that will be sometime in the future when we have moved on from the maelstrom of emotions that threaten to overwhelm us right now.

I will try and answer you comments, but if I do not, know that they are appreciated.

70 comments:

  1. May your dear Husband Keith Rest in Peace. Thoughts and prayers with you all.
    Love, Alison in Wales x

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  2. For you and your family my sincere condolences. We have never met (and will never meet) but I think you will know that your complete blog-follow-family will grieve with you and will want to comfort you.
    The way you describe the last day and what you will do in his memory sounds very loving.
    Love, Wendy from the Netherlands

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  3. No need to answer, you've been amazing and we have been honoured you have shared xx

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  4. Sorry to hear about Keith though it must be a relief for you that he is no longer suffering. Love and prayers to you and your family xx

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  5. I grieve with you Jennie, it is a sad loss Keith's passing but you were all there as a family - his last days were happy. Don't feel the need to write blogs or comments, we all know where you are and you and your family will be in our hearts. Bless xxx

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  6. Thinking of you BB and hoping you are feeling peaceful. Allow yourself to be enveloped in the love of your family. You have been amazing in your care for Keith this past year - such a wonderful testament of your love for him which will never die. Love Sarah x

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  7. So sorry to hear this. Will be thinking about you as you work your way through all the things that have to be done and all the emotions. I'm glad your family are with you. Take Care. ((more hugs))

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  8. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. x

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  9. So sorry to hear your sad news (Sandy Mid Wales)

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  10. Keith is now at peace and out of pain. Take care of yourself now. Hugs.
    Love Yvonne

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  11. I'm so sorry. Look after yourself now after such a difficult time. Thinking of you all.

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  12. My thoughts are with you and your family, BB. Rest in Peace, Keith. With love, Elaine.

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  13. RIP Keith. So glad that you could have happy conversation including him. Good memories to keep you going on xx

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  14. I am so sorry. Having been through this the only words that I can offer are that it does get easier to deal with the loss - I am nearly 2 years in and things have shifted and I am learning to live a new life without my love. Remember to eat - if people ask if there's anything you need, say food. I couldn't prepare a meal I was so distraught. I was overwhelmed by flowers which were beautiful but I didn't have the inclination to arrange them and didn't have enough vases. Big hugs to you all.

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  15. The next time I have fish and chips I will think of him.

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  16. I am so sorry. Keith's passing is such a loss. You are in my thoughts.

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  17. Sending love and prayers to you and your family at this very sad time🙏. Jan in Castle Gresley

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  18. I have followed you for a very long time,but have never commented. I'm so sorry for your loss and send my deepest condolences to you and your family. RIP man who loved his family above all else and comforting hugs to a brave lady, who has my utmost admiration x

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  19. Thinking of you at this sad time. Sue H

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  20. Oh J x I echo everyone else’s words here. You are an inspiration, no one could have done more. The coming days and weeks and months will be so different for you, lots of emotions but you will find a new strength and way forward as long as you give yourself time and space to rest up. Keith was a wonderful chap, no one knew wood in all its forms , whether planks or a fine cabinet like him and he will be remembered for that. Rest in peace Mr C and it was an honour meeting you over the years, your wife did you proud didn’t she x x x Danette x x x

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  21. My sincere condolences. I’m so sorry for your loss.
    KJ

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  22. Major hugs and love to you all. Words are never enough at a time like this and I am so sorry. You have done a sterling job and been there for him 100% over a very difficult time. No one could have done more. RIP Keith and now time for you Jennie to rest and come too and be with your loved ones. Take your time as grief happens differently for everyone and there is no time scale, no rush, only your way. Love to you all. Tricia xx

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  23. I am really sorry about Keith, but he could not have had a better carer than you!
    Bun

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  24. I'm so sorry for your sad loss.
    Take good care of yourself. xxx

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  25. Thinking of you and your family...so much love coming your way. I'm so very, very sorry for your loss. I'm so glad it could be a peaceful transition for Keith, surrounded by those who loved him best and had shared in so much that was wonderful in life. Take great care of yourself...~Melanie

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  26. Oh, Jennie. So, so deeply sorry. May Keith rest in everlasting peace. Sending love, Debbie xx

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  27. Oh Jennie. My condolences to you and your family. Your memories will help you all through these days. Hugs to you.

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  28. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. May Keith rest in peace.
    Oddny (Lesley) xx

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  29. His suffering is over and I'm sure there is so much to process. kind thoughts to you and your family.

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  30. I was sorry to read this very sad news - you have been a wonderful and loving carer to your husband during his difficult time of need. Keith will now be at peace, but do take care of yourself too.

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  31. So sorry for your loss. May you find comfort in your family gathered around you and in memories of your dear Keith. His farewell sounds perfect, he left knowing how much he was loved and valued. Love and pace to you all.

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  32. So very sorry for your loss, but glad you had these last few days all together to bring Keith peace at the end gently and with his family. My thoughts and prayers with you all at this sad time. Both my father and mother (14 months apart) passed at home, listening to their favorite music, watching (when able) their favorite movies (Dad), or TV shows (Mom) with family, so very wonderful that Keith was able to do so with all of you. And what a beautiful way to bring him to his final rest, and your fish & chip meal / celebration of him sounds lovely.
    Dawn P. Albany, GA USA

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  33. I'm so relieved that your husband didn't have to go into Shrewsbury hospital and was able to stay at home with his loving family. Sending you all hugs Anne xx

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  34. Peace be with all of you.

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  35. Thinking of you dear blogger friend and wishing you strength physically and mentally to cope with the next few weeks. Family is so important at this time and thinking of family, so good that Keith got to hold his granddaughter.

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  36. I am so sorry. it is good you could all be there with him and talking to him, sounds just what anyone would want. Please accept my condolences and pass them on to your family.

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  37. Dear Jennie, I was so sad to read about Keith's death, but you were all there, his family to share happy memories with him. You have been a brilliant carer to him and couldn't have done enough as has your family. Please take care of yourself. Hugs Xx

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  38. I'm so sorry for your loss, there are no words. You were such a blessing to him, took such good care, now take care of yourself, and rest up. Hugs to you from a faithful reader in New York.
    Della

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  39. I was very sad to read your news. I feel that I have lived many steps with you along the way as I lost my lovely husband too albeit many years ago. Take comfort in the time you had together and rest well knowing that Keith is now at peace. xxx

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  40. So very sorry for your loss. 🌹 My deepest condolences to you and all the family. It sounds as though you made his final days the very best ones possible. Sending much love. xx

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  41. I am very sorry to hear of your sad loss but I am relieved he died at home surrounded by his family and not in hospital. Love and peace to you all at this sad time.

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  42. A sad day for you but Happy Memories Always.N

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  43. My sincere condolences to you and your family.
    May Keith's memory be a blessing.

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  44. Such sad news. Keith was loved and cared for by you and your family right to the end. R.I.P. Keith.
    Love Jan Bx

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  45. How sad for you. Am pleased you managed you keep him at home and have some gentle days with him. A different life awaits you with hopefully wonderful memories of what was and new enjoyments and pleasures x

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  46. My deepest condolences. You were a wonderful wife right to the end.

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  47. I often wonder how thinks were going with you and when I pop down to Texco at Landod wonder if I would bump into you and Keith but lately on reading your posts I have been fearing the worst. I am sorry for your loss, May he rest in peace.

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  48. So sorry to read this and wish you peace and strength for the future.

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  49. I am so sorry for your loss. What a blessing that you were able to keep that promise you made that he would end his days peacefully at home with the family around him. Love Ruta x

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  50. I am so sorry and wish you and your family peace and hope for the coming days.

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  51. Virtual hugs at this sad time for you and your family.

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  52. What a wonderful send-off you and the family gave Keith, just the people and things, and foods he loved. May the happy memories and photos gladdwn your heart in the days and months ahead.

    Deepest sympathy and hugs

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  53. So sorry to hear this news and send my condolences to you and your lovely family. It was good that Keiths last few days were at home, surrounded by loved ones. A fish and chip supper in a place he loved is a great idea for a send off. Look after yourself now, we will all be here in blogland when you feel you can return. Sending hugs.

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  54. Hugs and love. You were amazing and still are. I am glad he is no longer trapped in a body that didn't work for him. Hugs and love to you all.

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  55. My sincere condolences on the loss of Keith. Your memories are something to share with the family and hold close to your heart.

    God bless.

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  56. So very sorry to hear of Keiths passing. His final days were with the ones who meant the world to him. Hold on to all the good memories as you get through the next phase. Take care of yourself, and rest. ❤️💔❤️ Janice in Alberta, Canada.

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  57. Sincere condolences from Australia: Thinking of you and your family at this sad time.

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  58. So sorry for your loss.

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  59. So sorry. You did all you could and Keith's last days wete the best you could make it.

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  60. I’m so sorry guy or your loss
    KJ

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  61. Thinking of you and the family. May you find peace and rest in the days to come. You worked so very hard to make Keith's final months and his last few days a blessing. Now it is time for you to be good to yourself. xx

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  62. I am so sorry to hear of your sad loss, and my thoughts are with you xx

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  63. I'm so sorry for yours and your family's lose. I hope you can unite around each other in the coming days to take comfort.. X

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  64. Oh, hugs to you. You have done such a magnificent, loving job of caring for Keith during this dreadful illness. Now you will be bereft, and exhausted. I do pray people nearby will support you as you adjust to this new state of your life.

    I"m so glad you were able to have the family surround Keith in those final hours, and have him aware how loved he was. You can do no more. May he be at peace and may you find your peace too. XX Virginia

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  65. I'm so sorry for your loss. You did so well caring for him, and what an achievement to make his final days peaceful and filled with love, at home in familiar surroundings with his loved ones.
    Sending huge hugs and condolences. xx

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  66. So sorry for your loss. You've been amazing and inspiring coping with everything and you were able to keep your promise to Keith, that must mean so much. Look after yourself and take care XX Blods

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  67. Sending deepest sympathy and condolences for the loss of your beloved husband Keith Be kind to yourself x

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  68. So sorry to hear this Jenny xxx

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